Cuff Me: Fifty Shades of Grey (the Play)

 

A friend and I went to see a rather spicy and naughty play
at Actor’s Temple
called “Cuff Me: Fifty Shades of Grey…”
of it, I’ve not much to say…
It’s about a man named Christian Grey…
He liked control and having things his way…
He used his Yankee Doodle on a gal with an empty noodle
and with a little paddy whack, they hit the sack and the rack
Okay…
that was “Cuff Me: Fifty Shades of Grey…”

Musical director, Amy Jones, Director Sonya Carter…
made Matthew Brian Bagley and Laurie Elizabeth Gardner work harder…
Alex Gonzalez and Tina Jenson filled out the cast….
They all acted mightily to the last…
Written by Bradford McMurran, Jeremiah Albers, and Sean Michael Devereux.                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                           Conceived by Tim Flaherty…
the play is guilty of assault, but not quite battery….

Here the Top controls the bottom, then the bottom replaces top…
Poor disturbed Christian makes quite the flip flop…
Via Christian and Ana, the rich meet Fannie Mae I
so say I, the play is “Cuff Me: Fifty Shades of Grey.”

Fifty Shades of Grey, the book, was a big sensation
read across the entire nation…
However, this play was a musical parody…
which titillated ladies came to see…
With each smack came a delighted giggle
and how the ladies did wiggle, when Grey pulled out his fiddle…
But anyway…
that was “Cuff Me: Fifty Shades of Grey.”

“Cuff me, buff me, stuff me, oh let us all enthrall…
Use the whip, the cane, the hatchet; it doesn’t hurt at all…
Remember the safe word; try the leather gag ball….
Please do, please don’t, oh yes, oh no, please stay, just go,
I like it, I hate it, I just don’t know!”
“But here’s a leg up to widen the appeal…”
says ditzy Anastasia Steele….
What can a reviewer say! That was “Cuff Me: Fifty Shades of Grey.”

Now Christian Grey is a fickle one, who enjoys smacking boys on their bun.
Upon the boys he uses his bird hook…was that in the original book?
“Hand me a rake, for Christ Sake,” says Christian to his boy…
“Look in my bag of delights for yet another vibrating toy…”
“On your knees, beg me please. Call me Daddy…
while you lay upon the matte.”
“I’ll use the cane, if you like more pain…
Ah yes, its all in good play..
Obey. That was “Cuff Me: Fifty Shades of Grey.”

The audience ladies chuckle as he uses his belt buckle…
Clearly feeling heat, their breasts heave, their butts vibrate
their lonely lives set on fire, as Christian continues to titillate…
And then, at show end…
females made the actors their friend…
demonstrating they had lost their minds
taking photos with Bagley (Christian) spanking their behinds.
Clearly an unusual sight…
but I only came to review and write…
Though Shades of Grey wasn’t my cup of tea…
this review isn’t about me…

So if you care to Master bait and can’t wait, don’t hesitate…
go along for the ride, get astride…
turn pink, and like kink…
I think…
you’ll enjoy “Cuff Me: Fifty Shades of Grey”
If that’s your kind of play.

 

 

 

 

 

 

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