Not About Settling Down

(Terri Jones Salter, right).

“Where would I be without him?  Who would I come home to and who would love me?” Janice was heard saying.
While many might assume these are the words of a woman who is on the fringes of society, they would be wrong.  “Janice”, (not her real name), is CEO of one of the largest retail chains in the nation. Many women say they want healthy relationships, but instead, “settle” down and accept out-and-out destructive partners.

Some say, “Stop making excuses ladies!”  But a more insight-driven perspective sees blame as an obstacle, not a solution. Terri Jones Salter, Minister and Author of Sins of My Mother (Xulon Press) has never been afraid to speak her mind as she encourages and uplifts all women.

“Anyone looking for perfection will definitely be disappointed,” she said, in a recent interview. “However, I do think some women set their standards ridiculously high because they fear intimacy.  They don’t want to take down the walls they’ve erected around their heart, so they raise the bar high enough so no ‘hu-MAN’ can reach it.”

But all this sound advice, a book and thousands of hours clocked helping women could not come without some personal investment. “When I was young-my mom told me that young men should not beep the horn, when they come to pick me up for a date.  Instead, they should get out of the car and ring the bell.  I was worth the short walk from the car to the door. She taught me many things that helped me internalize value.  She taught me not to settle.  If we don’t start building young women’s self-esteem at an early age; if parents don’t take the time to teach self-respect, settling is on its way to becoming the norm and not the exception.”    

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